Hectic week

With little Lisa (well not so little since she is 20yrs old now) coming to Florida to visit her mother (Joyce, Nina's best friend who lives with the rest of us), things have been a bit hectic.

More drama...of course, add another female into the mix, and you have a pretty good chance that voices will be raised, and it won't be male voices, heh.

The good thing is that for the first time in my life I went to Cici's for dinner and it was a fun time to spend with the kids. I was actually offered the choice of going or staying home as always. Well, since I don't see the outside world much I said yes, of course.

Yesterday was a tough day to handle, it was the anniversaty of the day her father was taken to the hospital where he later on passed away. I tried to show some affection, I'm not heartless...but was told to stay away and I did.

Tomorrow there are plans to go out to a Buffet which the family goes to once a month, and when my wife is in a good mood, actually asks me if I want to go. My nephew loves the place, and I enjoy my time there with the kids a lot...and they got sushi, closest thing to ceviche =D

Nina's plan was to drop the invite to Joyce at the last possible minute, she is holding grudges left and right on her...from not doing a load of towels, to not cooking, and drinking with friends (she is an alcoholic and is not supposed to drink).

Sometimes I find it amusing, the whole figthing among themselves over such minor things which can easily be worked out. I'm well trained, once the explosions go off...I run for cover, right into the bedroom, my castle, where my puter and my cat keep me company.

I guess I haven't talked much about Rosie. My baby, my little furry daughter. I had a cat years ago in my early 20's, was a white and orange cat which...to say the least, I did not treat properly.

Never in a thousand years I would have imagined I would have another cat, or that I would be to emotionally attached to her.

So I present: Rosie!



That's all for today.

And here comes the sun

Yesterday would've been another crappy day. Nina screaming at the kids, complaining about her best friend changing, complaining about her brother or her sister (or both); the usual day living with her. However I finally got in touch with my friend and found out that we're still in good terms, which made my day.

Today I logged in Anarchy Online, which has now become my #2 favorite MMO. I played AO since 2001 in its original beta stage and public release, also been in every beta of every single expansion since then. I have tried SWG (Star Wars Galaxies) and EVE in the past 2 years for a short time, but then didn't like how Sony had nerfed their game and pretty much removed the fun aspects of it and with EVE not being able to interact with avatars and being in a ship all the time alone was boring.

This year I took a chance and bought a lifetime account for Lord of the Rings Online. Let me say, it was a wise investment, no monthly payments ever and I'm enjoying the game a great deal. It's now my favorite MMO.

I played AO a little yesterday night, since they released new high level content. I didn't get to see it all, I will log in more often the next few weeks to check out the new areas and phatz.

I guess I didn't mention I'm a long time gamer. When I came to the states, well...Nintendo was out, and the 8 bit goodness hooked me, and in turn made me a gamer for life. I don't remember a time when I was not playing some video game during any given week, of course these days I stick to PC games and leave the console gaming to my nephew and niece (and their father who is also into video games). I guess I was trying to re-capture my childhood at the beggining, but these days it's not rare for adults to play video games, hell now it's a career.

Well, I better get off before Nina wakes up and demands me to make her coffee, heh..

Bomb went offf, again

Yesterday Nina (my wife) was talking to her brother on the phone and she exploded. Apparently she thought he said "fuck you bitch" to her; I know him long enough to know he wouldn't say that, knowing how she would react. How did she respond?

She exploded, screaming at the top of her lungs, in front of the kids and god...saying awful things which neither my nephew or niece should've heard. That was one of the worst fights in the family I've seen...and that wasn't all. She then picks a fight with her sister (she was home) and starts screaming at her.

I go and try to calm her down...and I get screamed at! (not as bad as Jason got screamed at)

Sindy (my sister-in-law) took the kids to their bedrooms, but considering that they could still easily hear Nina's screams...

It's stuff like this that I'm sick and tired of, people have to walk on eggshells with her because anything sets her off, big time.

This fight lasted hours, then the silent treatment was given to Sindy and Jason got it in person when he got home, poor guy.

Yesterday I thought..if she screams at me like she did with Jason...I would pack my stuff and leave that day...

I'm trying to change, get fit, lose weight, find some spiritual meaning in my life, so that I can do what I need to do in the future.

If there is one thing that I did not grow up with, was screaming people in my family. Sure there were arguements, but screams were very rare. I've had to get used to this enviroment...but I keep asking myself how long until I can't take it anymore.

Between the arguments and screams that are almost a daily routine...the insults I get...her threats...It really makes me feel that I don't belong here, even thought I love the kids dearly, and my cat Rosie...I'm hoping today is a better day.

Light of my life

My niece and nephew are the light of my life. I think it's time to show them off a bit.

Here they are with their acting teacher from this summer and pictures from their play.


Erika singing (red shirt).




Jonathan performing (orange shirt).


Kids with their acting teacher.


Eeka and Jon (their nicknames) with Phoenix, Barry's grandson who is their "cousin".


Eeka looking cute in her new Nerds sleepwear, boy did she get all worked up when I called her a nerd, heh.

I've been trying to get in touch with a good friend of mine, and haven't been too successul and I'm worried I may have lost touch with my friend.

On a more upbeat note, I've ordered a book to help me change my life, and to aid me in the changes that I will need to adapt in my life. What book?

"Daodejing: The New, Highly Readable Translation of the Life-Changing Ancient Scripture Formerly Known as the Tao Te Ching". A friend of mine who was a firm believer of the Dao/Tao was confident and successful and did help me during the time we were friends (we're not talking because my wife told me I couldn't communicate with him because he divorced her best friend).

I need to change, I need to get ready, I need to adapt. Of course I also need money, and I'm working on that.

How did I miss this?

It's 5AM in the morning and I woke up with a thought. I do have experienced on a field that does make decent money. I know how to build computers, Sure a lot of people know that, but I think most use their skill to build their own for themselves of their friends/family. Why not try and offer a service for a flat fee...like $50 to build ANY computer as long as parts are provided?

I dunno, it could work. I got to think this through a bit.

Silence is not always golden

The kids have gone to Orlando for 3 days with my sister-in-law and Barry's family for some fun. I miss them already; sure they are noisy but then what kids aren't?

I hope they have a great time and don't think of my wife crying this morning when they left.

Erika (or Eeka, the nickname I gave her) promised to make up for the days she is not here to hug me, heh...I look forward to the ninja hugging.

Wife is fighting with her best friend, nothing new. I told her today about my job hunting, since she probably would find out eventually. If I get a job, I will add a bike to my list. Always good for exercise, yup.

Virtual Jobs

Well, I started job hunting online. Fast thing to learn...avoid the "get paid to take surveys" scheme, fell for 1, now my maibox has 3 times the amount of junk mail. The legitimate ones are free, the scam sites ask you to pay a membership to take surveys which you then "get paid for".

I'm doing research on virtual jobs. Like customer service/care representative online and such. Since I didn't finish high school, it's going to be tough to find a company willing to hire me. But then...if a restaurant hires wetbacks like me to wash their dishes...why not answer the phone or emails?

I think investing on a laptop may come in handy, it would break whatever I have saved but if it helps me keep an online job, it would probably pay for itself within a month or so.

I need to get my ass back on track, for too long I've stood on the corner watching my life go by...

The good news these days is that I'm sticking to my diet, lost 6 pounds and I intend to lose 20 more. I want to fit back in my 34 pants, heh.

Funny thing, that before I got married I ate normal portions of food. I was used to grandma's cooking. She didn't like microwaves even before she got her bypass and the doctors prohibited one in the house.

Man, she would cook a good amount of food, for 2-3 days, but god...good home cooking! hell she even would go upstairs to our neighbors and hand them a plate of food!

They loved her.

Of course back then I would get on my bike every couple of days, to visit my friend Ian. I think that is what kept me in decent shape and not overweight.

Hmm, 7am. Better stop before she wakes up.

Bday, a not so special day

A tradition has been broken, and it pretty much ruined my bday. Every year, for the past 5-6 years on my bday my wife would buy me ceviche. Ceviche is a peruvian dish, which my grandmother would make for me since I was a kid. it's an unusual dish to say the least. Chunks of fish cooked in lemon juice, usually served with rice, corn and onions. A serving of it is not expensive, about $10.

Early in the morning, I was told by her she wasn't going to buy it, because I didn't deserve it. I hid my dissapointed well and said I wasn't expecting it...but it hit me like a truck inside.

The whole day I thought maybe she said it to throw me off and surprise me...nope, I was wrong. Of course.

However it seems the rest of the family disagreed with her, and I guess that gave her some guilt. So guess what replaced the ceviche...she bakes me a cake instead of buying one. I appreciated the gesture, smiled when they sang happy bday last night and enjoyed a few pieces of cake.

Still it hurt my feelings deeply that she wouldn't get me the one thing I look forward to the whole year.

Could I go out and buy it? Sure, if I had a car and if I still had my driver's license. It's a very long walk to the place that sells it, and asking to get driven there would start a slew of problems with her I think.

Well, at least the kids cheered me up a bit. I got my bday hugs early in the morning, that did make me very happy.

I got to find some job to work from home, I need to make money for a lawyer.

Happy B-day to me

I was born August 2nd, 1969. The year we landed on the moon. My grandma always said that I had been born in a good year. I miss her.

Florida has been home for 7 years now, decent weather (except during hurricane season), different from the New York I had grown to love.

Yeah, I miss NY, specially Brooklyn and Manahattan. I knew my way around there; buses, subway and I had a racing bike that got me around Brooklyn in between, even rode into Manhattan a few times. I lived there for 13 years; sometimes I wonder what would've happened had I stayed there.

I miss the statue of liberty, the empire state building, the 4th of july parade, new years, christmas...man, those were fun years.

Florida may have better overall weather, but I was happier in NY. I was single.

Cake Mystery, or Misery...

Today I was accused of eating cake which was out-of-bounds. Confused? Most people would be. There are a few rules in the house, which are specific for me.

Here they are:

Cakes, they are for my wife, her brother and sister. Not for me.
Soda, same rule.
Snacks, same.
Fruits, same.
Cereal, I can only eat what is specifically designated for me, usually Rice Crispies generic brand, which is fine by me.

If I'm hungry, I must eat leftovers (that is ok, wasting food is not something I like to see) or eat from a supply of Cup-o-Noodles which is mostly purchased for me. I used to eat these things when I was single and on a budget so I'm used to it.

It's not as bad as it sounds, there are things I'm allowed to have.

Milk, cause dry cereal is not very enjoyable.
Bread, and the belogna which every store has on sale for 99 cents a pack, heh. I eat like a single man half of the day.

Home cooking is great, unless everyone only knows 3 or 4 ways to cook chicken, and you have chicken every day for the past...5 years. When I used to cook (before my wife "fired" me as a cook) I would experiment with different condiments to spice things up a bit. Most was a hit in the house, they loved the new flavors, sometimes I would hit a wall and think "ooook, not going to do that again". Trial and error, combined with recipes I would get from the web.

During one of my experiments...well, the chicked looked burned, but it really wasn't. I had used a bit too much of a sauce and it burned at the bottom of the glass pan given the look of being burned. That along with a little smoke from the oven got my wife screaming to high heaven and "fired" me. I haven't cooked since, and that was about a year ago.

Well, back to the cake.

I do occasionally cheat a little bit, on very small portions so it's not noticed. However today I didn't touch the banana cake that she accused me of eating. She is the queen of scream, hell I told her she would do well in horror movies the other day, she thought I was kidding and laughed.

Usually a disagreement of this nature in a normal family would be done in a few minutes. Not here. This was dragged through from early morning into the night. I got so sick of it I went to sleep in the afternoon. It's how I've been handling bad situations because to put it in simple terms, no matter what I say, I will be wrong.

I don't sleep at night anyways, I'm my brother-in-law's designated alarm clock, since his (which is so loud sometimes my wife wakes up screaming to shut it off disregarding the fact the kids are sleeping) doesn't do the job.

Usually I wake up him between 3:30-5:00AM, depending on his schedule. I'm hoping now that I don't have to hear anymore screams about a banana cake tomorrow morning.